day 6: home
We went to Jersey where our family lives for a week at Christmastime. It was an especially nice visit. This year both my mom and a dear old friend are relocating to the area where I grew up, where my dad and Elie's mom already live. That fact made it extra hard to leave and return to Illinois. It felt like all my people were just starting The Big Party but I had to go. It's easy to think of the great way that life could be if I lived there: there would be casual weekend lunches, and grandparents who could make it to school programs, and all those people who know the back story. And less stillness.
When Elie and I were getting ready to move out here & I was feeling apprehensive, my mother told me when her mother told her, which is that sometimes you have to get out from under your big family (Elie and I both have these) in order to let your little family grow. I think that's been very true for us, and we've grown bushels. I really do like the place I'm in now, our funny little routine, and our dear friends. It's a bona fide life. I like the stillness we have because that's when I get to do this and stitch a little that. It's a good home.
An speaking of homes, Elie did this to the kitchen today. Move over sketchy in-kitchen powder room with louvered doors, hello pantry.
Love you. Have a coffee by the beach for me!
It's me, Suzanne, way west of you, in Portland, Oregon (from
QuiltBlockSwap) I haven't written in quite a while, but I always
check your blog from time to time to see what you're up to &
always find it cozy and interesting. I still have the great quilt blocks
you sent me (confession: they are sitting in a beautiful pile of
color that has yet to morph into something delicious, but in time
they will. Oh yes, they will.) Just wanted to say hi & to comment
on your post today. I've had the same thoughts a million times
over the years, raising a family 3,000 from a living relative of mine or
my (then) husband's family. My family was pretty crazy & his was
Mormon, so distance was important to have a healthy shot at
functional environment. But still, there was the yearning for
connection and close family and the fears of isolation and going it
totally on our own. In spite of all the longing, I grew into the adult
I wanted to be, which made me a better parent. My kids are
grown now (though still young) & when I visit back home (NY) now,
there is a different yearning -- to be closer to my aging parents,
of course, but even more, to reconnect with my 5 siblings there.
It may be that as I near retirement, I will resettle there, as a
very different person than when I left, to see if my siblings and I
can reunite & care for each other. I find great comfort in that
idea, even if I never follow through. I just thought maybe that idea
might help you think of your distance from origin-family seem not
only do-able, but also as a progressive act that will result in
stronger family love...for all members. Sorry for taking up all
this space. Keep up your great creative work & your great
posts!
--Suzanne (still rockin' & creating at 55).